3.15.2007

Love and Loathing in the Midwest Regional

Note: As a wholly obsessive supplement to my latest FOXSports.com column, welcome to Love and Loathing in the NCAA Tournament. The fourth in a four part series that will provide my totally biased and baseless evaluation of each team in the tournament.

Also known as: "The Last Tournament Breakdown you Need."

Check back daily as I'll be revelaing a new quarter of the bracket in the days leading up to Thursday's tip-off.

MIDWEST

1. FloridaLoathe - As defending champs and the closest thing we have to a favorite, it’s easy to loathe the Gators unless they’re your team. In fact, I don’t see how you could root for UF otherwise. They’ve got talent, painful balance (four players averaging between 12 and 13 points) and braggin’ rights (both football AND basketball). Who likes that?

16. Jackson StateLoathe – See my inverse reasoning for North Texas. I think it’s time we honor Walter.

8. ArizonaLove – Ever since learning that Lute Olson insists upon having a cactus at mid-court, my respect for the Wildcats has grown. It’s all in the details.

9. Purdue - Loathe - Even the memory of Gene Keady scares the hell out of me.

5. ButlerLove – As I noted in the column, Butler and Hoosiers are forever linked. Is it too much to ask for them to run the picket fence at some point during the tournament?

12. Old Dominion - Love - I'm not sure what it means, but this is the most romantic sounding name in the tournament. I shall never refer to my hometown again. Henceforth, it will be my old dominion.

4. MarylandLove – I like turtles and I like yellow and black stripes. Maryland provides both.

13. DavidsonLoathe – Another school, another honor code. Does anyone remember laughter?

6. Notre DameLoathe – If I had gone to Notre Dame, I’d be the biggest, fightinest Irish fan you’d ever seen. I didn’t.

11. WinthropLoathe – If not for Winthrop, I never would’ve known that Rock Hill, SC is part of an area known as “Metrolina.” I’m not 100% sure what that means but it sounds a lot like urban sprawl and, as we all know, urban sprawl is responsible for everything evil today. I imagine the campus is located between an Applebees and a Wal-Mart.

3. OregonLove – This isn’t so much a school as a means for product roll-out for UO alum and Nike founder Phil Knight. From psychedelic football uniforms to official school colors that incorporate the words “Thunder” (Green) and “Lightning” (Yellow) into the mix, I’m somehow fine will all of this.

14. Miami (Not the one you think)Loathe – This school has been making a mockery of ESPN’s Bottom Line since the feature debuted, necessitating differentiation between “The U” and, well, “Not The U.” In fact, why not let the Redhawks have “Miami” all to themselves and make the Hurricanes go by Miami (The one you care about) on all tickers?

7. UNLVLove – Not realizing that I could’ve gone to college in Las Vegas is probably the worst oversight of my life. Thus, I’ve always lived vicariously through the Runnin’ Rebels (or Hustlin’ Rebels, as they’re known on the diamond).

10. Georgia Tech - Love - A school capable of "clean, old-fashioned hate" is a school after my own heart.

2. WisconsinLove - Back in 1999 I went to Minneapolis to catch the first round of tournament games in the Metrodome and sat directly in front of a Badger fan who, after UW won one of their traditional 48-44 masterpieces, said “That’s Wisconsin. An offensive juggernaut.” They’re not fun to watch but they’re still lovable in their ugliness.

16. Texas A&M-Corpus ChristiLove – This school is located on its own island! One of only two schools to make the claim and they’re both on the Gulf Coast. The body of Christ? Amen. That was once a Final Jeopardy question and I got it. Loved Corpus ever since.

Previous Entries: the South, the West, and the East.

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