You Say Coincidence, I Say Fate

I'm not afraid to admit it: I frequently like to start my summer days by listening to this song:



A good friend of mine named Steve Goodman wrote that song. He also wrote this one:



Why I didn't make that connection sooner, I'll never know, but now that I have Steve Goodman is officially one of my favorite people on earth.

Let me, let me, let me!

Cubs are Dead, Go Big Red

Help me Sam Keller. You're my only hope.

Otherwise, I'm looking at my worst sports night of the year.

Please Help Me I'm Falling

I wish I was like Sweet Lou. I wish that I could laugh off the Cubs 10th loss in their last 13 games. I wish I wasn't worried about the Cardinals who are now just 3 1/2 games back in the Central. Mostly, I just wish they'd win a damn game.

"It seems like we're in a pennant race," Piniella said last night after the loss. "I'm not too damn sure."

It doesn't really feel like it. In fact it feels more like April or May. I wake up every morning angry and amazed at the new and exciting ways the Cubs have found to lose. I don't want to watch the games right now but I'm powerless to stop. For two-plus months it was great to be a Cubs fan but now it's the same as it ever was and it makes me whiny.

I know, I know, they're still as close as they were one week ago but winning the Central is now their only viable option. Five teams top the Cubs in the wildcard standings meaning the only likely route to the post-season runs right through Milwaukee. Or, worse, St. Louis.

Maybe that's the real source of my current displeasure. I'd be happy to lose the division to the Cerveceros. Milwaukee would immediately become my rooting interest for October, but the Cardinals? That's almost too horrific to even consider.

This Could Get Ugly

A good friend of mine really struggled to watch playoff baseball, not because he wasn't interested but rather he was too keenly interested. Simply put, the pressures of October were nearly too much for him to handle.

I'm starting to understand how he felt and it's only August. In the National League only four teams can reasonably be eliminated from the playoff chase. It's sort of like watching European horse racing (excruciating for the record): everybody stands in their irons in one big, barely jogging mass for three-quarters of the course, then hunkers down for a furious sprint in the stretch.

That's how the NL feels after the Rockies swept the Brewers this week and then split with Cubs to leave them only two games out of the Wild Card and within striking distance in the NL West. The Rockies! Steve Phillips just picked them to make the playoffs.

I'm fine with that as long as it doesn't come at the expense of the Cubs. Sweet Lou's squad has not responded to the loss of Soriano, going 2-4 on their latest road trip. The losses were only tempered by the fact that Milwaukee was losing too, but Chicago needs to find some answers this week at home against Cincinnati and a suddenly relevant St. Louis team. When Soriano went down I circled August 28-30 on my calendar. It's the final series between the Cubs and Brewers and it was going to be pivotal. Now I'm just hoping both teams can tread water long enough that the winner of that series will still be in first place at the end of the month.

And then there's the Red Sox. As you've no doubt heard, Eric Gagne didn't have a good trip to the Charm City and now the Yankees are a scant four games back in the AL East. Make no mistake, if New York catches Boston this race is over. Boston's hopes of a World Series already look pretty shaky but if the Yankees return from the dead it would be catastrophic for Sox fans. They had done something they never would've had the balls to do before this year: bury the Yanks, disregard them.

To lose that lead? Well, it would feel like 2003 all over again.

I can't deal with all of this, so I'm just going to keep preparing for college football season and try not to scoreboard watch. Somebody nudge me when this race reaches the stretch. I'm afraid it's all I can give.

Morning Walk-thru - The 200th Post

What you're reading right here is the 200th post in the history of HiPlainsDrifter.com. Join me as we celebrate the bicentennial by walking through the biggest stories (to me) from yesterday...

1/1000th Better...Yes, I am proud to announce that the Cubs are your NL Central division leaders by one one-thousandth of a percentage point. By beating the Phillies in the bottom of the 9th, coupled with a Brewers loss, Chicago now leads Milwaukee .538 to .537 in winning percentage.

It wasn't a pretty win, but the win marks the second straight night the Cubs have lost a lead and fought back to wave the white flag, but that's just the beginning of how much has changed with the Chicago nine. The Cubs are making plays on defense, running the bases aggressively and getting some unreal production from role players.

Of course, I attribute this all to the fact that back in June I ordered my own authentic replica of the 1908 Cubs lid from Cooperstown Ball Cap Co. It arrived just in time to see Chicago take the top flag pole spot at Wrigley and I'm not taking it off until they lose it.

Stewart Mandel is the straw that stirs Nebraska's drink...but for the Cornhusker faithful that drink might just be hemlock.

A few weeks back, Mandel riled up many Bugeaters by defending his position on Bill Callahan. This week he's entertaining the notion of Nebraska joining the Big 10. It's purely conjecture but it is an interesting notion to consider.

With Oklahoma off the yearly schedule, do you care if Nebraska gave up the rest of the Big 12 North? Would you miss Iowa State or even Colorado?

I think I would. Colorado is so cute when they hate us but, more than that, I simply can't stomach the thought of having to watch Big 10 football for an entire year each and every year.

Learning is fun...Be sure to check out Jeffie Husker's--of Double XP fame--first column for Cold, Hard, Football Facts.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with CHFF, it's pretty much the gold standard for pro football blogs and now, behind Jeff's efforts, they're branching out into the college game. It's basically Baseball Prospectus only not about baseball.

Moving forward...I'll be off witnessing nuptial bliss the next two days so if anything major happens it will have to wait until the weekend.

Otherwise, I'll be back Monday and by then we'll be in serious college football mode. See you then...

Are the Cubs really Good?

To answer that titular question...I think they just might be and I'm not quite sure how to handle that.

On Sunday, the Cubs went down 5-0 to the Astros but came back to win thanks in large part to five scoreless innings from the bullpen. Monday, after a seven-inning pitcher's duel between Linscomb and Hill, Chicago got two 8th inning runs and a blistering performance out of, can't believe I'm typing this, Bob Howry to win their fourth straight.

They're doing things right right now. Lou Piniella managed the Cubs to their win against the Giants. Can't remember the last time that happened. Aramis Ramirez saved the game with a brilliant diving stop on Sunday and had the game-winning RBI on Monday. Over the last month and a half, the unthinkable has happened. The Cubs are clutch.

For most of this season, Chicago had the stats of a National League contender. Now they are one. Baseball Prospectus loves them. It's a great time to be on Chicago's Northside right now, which is nice because...

The Plains go dark starting Tuesday...when I will be making my first trip to Wrigley Field since 1999. Bonds will be there, so will Zito, but really we'll be heralding the debut of Jason Kendall in a Cubs uniform.

Probably won't be back here until the weekend which means we'll miss the unveiling of NCAA Football 08, but once I'm back and get a few games under my belt college football season can officially begin.

And finally...I'm not sure there will be a better movie this fall than the Coen brothers' "No Country for Old Men." Just watch the trailer:



Cormac McCarthy is probably the best American writer of the past half-century and while "No Country for Old Men" isn't his best book it is the most cinematic which should make for one hell of a film.

Mark my words, Javier Bardem in the role of Anton Chigurh could go down as one of the all time great movie villains.

"Ultimate badass?" Indeed.

What Was I Thinking?: A Midseason Cubs Retrospective

For a guy who's not running a Cubs blog, I write entirely too much about Chicago's National League Baseball Club. Seeing as how we're at the All-Star Break, baseball's traditional mid-way point even though we're more than half way done, I thought now would be a good time to take a look back at all the melodrama, foolish optimism and frequent shoulder and elbow surgeries that come along with being a Cubs fan. I won't go game by game, but here are the highlights and lowlights of what I was feeling at the time.

We'll start at the top...

Opening Day -- The frustration was almost immediate.

"By my estimation, the Cubs 2007 season was 12 minutes old before I was totally pissed off. They were a great 12 minutes: Soriano swung mightily at the first pitch of the season, Thunder Matt was silenced, Derrek Lee was caught stealing and Hagwilt (Zambrano) kicked things off with a lead-off walk. Just what I had expected."

But it wasn't what I expected. Never would've guessed that Big Z would have an ERA north of 4.50 and go a middlin' 5-4 over the first two months of the season.

4.19.07 -- It's tough to make lasting judgment too early in the season, but this post represented a first for me: recapping a loss before it had officially become a loss. After watching the Cubs fight back to take a one-run lead in the seventh against the Braves, then give back three runs in the bottom half, I wrote the following:

"Scott Eyre came on and pitched pretty well initially. Got two quick outs then got hosed on a close 2-2 pitch that should've ended the inning. Of course that led to a walk and then the next batter grounded to former Gold Glover Caesar Izturis who played paddycake with the ball, allowing the runner, some random pinch hitter who I can't remember, to beat it out at first. (Aside: If you're not going to play something close to Gold Glove defense, Izturis, you're worthless because you're bat isn't winning any games.) From there you can just assume the rest. This is the Cubs afterall. Consecutive hits, three runs, Cubs load the bases with one out and threaten in the 8th but ground into a double play, Bob Wickman is summoned from his bowling league and Chicago ultimately loses."

The big reveal, of course, is that I didn't even wait for the Cubs final six outs to be recorded. No need, really, the Cubs don't win games like that, but I never would've guessed that they would actually load the bases. Shocking.

4.20.07 -- I jokingly try not to jinx Rich Hill--3-0, 0.67 ERA, 0.57 WHIP at the time--by claiming his hot start is just pure luck. Turns out it was. He's 5-6 now.

4.23.07 -- A bit of optimism! Not sure what I was thinking here, after the Cubs had just lost 2 of 3 to the Cardinals:

"Despite all that, I don't feel too bad about the Cubs after this weekend. They've been bad, but if they can pick up a couple of wins against the Brewers they'll have survived April. Two wins and they're knocking on the door for second in the division."

Where did that come from?

4.26.07 -- The best/worst news of the season thus far. The Cubs are right in the thick of things when you take the statistical approach (which I rarely do.)

"On one hand, this could be an encouraging sign. Eventually, these stats will have to show up in the won-loss ledger, right?

On the other, it really depresses me as it confirms something I've long suspected, the Cubs are bad because they're the Cubs."

This will come into play again later...

5.15.07 -- Leading the Mets 4-0, Scott Eyre enters the game to earn the pen's 10th loss of the season:

"Then the bullpen got involved. I'm seriously considering just calling them the baby-killers for the rest of the season because it's the only thing I can think of that's more distasteful than actually watching them pitch."

Almost the worst of times.

5.17.07 -- Make that 11 losses for the bullpen after blowing another 4 run lead.

"After celebrating at the plate, Ruben Gotay tugged his crotch and spit a large glob of tobacco juice on my heart, which was lying halfway between the mound and home and I didn't even mind. Felt like I deserved it."

This was probably the worst of times.

5.24.07 -- Jonah Keri validates my statistical analysis of the Cubs from a month earlier by noting that, according to Baseball Prospectus' Adjusted Standings, Chicago is actually leading the NL Central.

Except they ain't cause they're not. I hate statistics.

5.28.07 -- I was always a Michael Barrett fan, but even I could see through the haze and realize that Sweet Lou wasn't high on the Cubs backstop...

6.06.07 -- ..the great Dugout Punch-out doesn't help Barrett's case, but Lou does get kicked out on purpose hoping to jump-start his lethargic club.

"The Cubs have played six of 17-straight games and they're sitting at 3-3. Ending up above .500 at the end of that grueling stretch is essential."

Believe it or not, they do, going 9-8, but Barrett continues to struggle...

6.13.07 -- ..so much so, that I decided to stage an intervention and try to get Michael back on track...

6.21.07 -- ...alas, it's not enough as Barrett is shipped to San Diego and my Baseball-Reference sponsorship is rendered useless.

6.26.07 -- The season, perhaps, turns as the Cubs allow six runs in the 9th, but somehow fight back to win.

"That's the beauty of my little Cubs versus me stance: when they win, I win. It doesn't happen very often, but last night's game might have been the best of the season so far. The Cubs rolled for 24 outs, then I missed the disastrous last three, only to wake up in time to see a come from behind win.

I want to declare this game the sort of game that turns a season. The Cubs are within three games of .500 and streaking, but I think I'll just take note of it as the first time this season I felt like I watched an actual baseball team and call it a day."

7.2.07 -- The first half see-sawing mercifully ends.

"Who the hell are these guys? The Cubs don't do this, win games on squeeze plays, get out hit by the best team in their division and still win. It's absurd and these last 10 games have been about as good a stretch as I can remember as a Cubs fan.

All to get to .500. One game short of the halfway point of the season and the Cubs are perfectly average. I'm not trying to be Mr. Doom & Gloom, I'm ecstatic like everyone else, but let's realize where we're at. This little surge got the Cubs back to where they should've been all season. That's all. Now we're even, and Piniella knows it.

As Sweet Lou says, "Let's see if we can extricate ourselves from the .500 mark."

One week removed from that post, the Cubs are still in the same position. Trying to extricate themselves from the .500 mark, 4.5 back of the Brew Crew and I'll take that.

The Cubs probably deserve to be a .500 club, but early on they weren't even getting that so I guess I'll call the first half a wash. Chicago is within striking distance. They're alive. Lily and Marquis have been okay, Zambrano's rounding into form and some young guys are contributing.

My only concern--aside from the bullpen of course--is if somebody needs punching is Koyie Hill man enough to do it?

Morning Walk-thru - Who Voted for Barry Day

So how does this work?...I'm not quite sure what to do in this situation. The Cubs had the best record of any team in June and they're perfect so far in July. They just took two of three from the Brewers, and won nine of their last 10 to close out the month. They've hit that $#%^&! groove.

Who the hell are these guys? The Cubs don't do this, win games on squeeze plays, get out hit by the best team in their division and still win. It's absurd and these last 10 games have been about as good a stretch as I can remember as a Cubs fan.

All to get to .500. One game short of the halfway point of the season and the Cubs are perfectly average. I'm not trying to be Mr. Doom & Gloom, I'm ecstatic like everyone else, but let's realize where we're at. This little surge got the Cubs back to where they should've been all season. That's all. Now we're even, and Pinella knows it.

As Sweet Lou says, "Let's see if we can extricate ourselves from the .500 mark."

I like that, a bit overwrought, trying too hard to use some of the vocabulary words, but it's effective. Let's see if the Cubs will continue to be. They've got the Senators and the Pirates before the break. Now would be a good time to make a move.

Photo: AP/Jerry Lai

So how does this work (pt. 2)?...I'm not upset at the fact that Barry Bonds will be starting in the All-Star game. Doesn't bother me that he overcame a 119,000 vote deficit to knock Alfonso Soriano from the starting line-up. I just want to know how the hell it happened.

Think of all the people you know who follow baseball, people who would potentially vote for the All-Star starters. Do any of them like Bonds? Is there a single person who could even cast a "San Francisco sympathy" vote in your five? I don't know any but apparently there are almost a million of them.

So let's make today, July 2, Who Voted for Barry Day. You don't really have to do anything different, just be suspicious. Every person you see today, ask yourself: "Did they vote for Barry Bonds?"

What you do when you come to a conclusion is up to you.

Take a bow, Alfonso

Monday's typically aren't my favorite: back to work, no compelling programming, Arena Football, the usual reasons. But last night I was lucky as the Cubs had a night game against the Colorado Rockies and not only that, they were cruising towards their fourth straight win, up 8-3 going into the ninth.

Everything was looking good, like an easy two-hopper in shortstop heaven. Mike Fontenot was going to finish the game 5 for 5, Jason Marquis was going to get his first win since May 9th and the Cubs were all set for their fourth straight. In the top of the 9th, however, that lazy grounder took a bad hop and hit me straight in the cup. (I frequently wear it while even watching baseball.)

If you want to know what happened next, you can read it here. I'd tell you myself but I didn't see any of Colorado's comeback. I wasn't quite confident enough in a 5-run Cubs lead to go to bed, but I had dozed off with the game still going on. At approximately 11:20 I bolted awake, my internal Cubs distress meter had roused me and, sure enough, I looked to the computer to see the Rockies had scored sixth runs in the ninth. 9-8 Colorado.

Feigning disbelief--true disbelief isn't possible at this point with the Cubs--I was making all my usual overly dramatic proclamations: these are the types of games that turn seasons, this never would've happened with Joe Girardi at the helm, I'm done with this. As happens frequently, the game now was me against the Cubs.

Lead-off single in the 9th? Fine, now show me something else.

Two outs later and still only a runner at first? Just what I expected.

Two-strike, two-out single to keep hope alive by some kid named Koyie? Maybe for all those posers at Wrigley, but I know better.

Matsui commits his first error of the year on a sure game-ending groundball? Kind of crazy, but I would bet $1000 this game still ends on a harmless dribbler with the sacks stacked.

And then Soriano, 0-5 to this point, singles to center, scores two and Wrigley rocks like it hasn't since 2003.

That's the beauty of my little Cubs versus me stance: when they win, I win. It doesn't happen very often, but last night's game might have been the best of the season so far. The Cubs rolled for 24 outs, then I missed the disastrous last three, only to wake up in time to see a come from behind win.

I want to declare this game the sort of game that turns a season. The Cubs are within three games of .500 and streaking, but I think I'll just take note of it as the first time this season I felt like I watched an actual baseball team and call it a day.

UPDATE: And if you needed proof that I actually did snooze through the Rockies' six-run ninth, I wasn't even aware that a fan rushed on to the field to try and give Bob Howry a noogie. (I suspect.) While I will not condone this behavior, I do understand where it comes from. I would never physically confront a Cubs pitcher, but I probably wish that I could every single day. Here's the video:

Cubs lose some punch

I'm not going to lie, I was sad to see Michael Barrett go yesterday. Sure he was always a defensive liability. Yes, he was a distraction this season. Of course his trade to the Padres had nothing to do with any of that. When you have a chance to snap up Rob Bowen you take it.

Right. When you take Barrett's bat (Silver Slugger '06) into consideration with his glove (5 E, 10 PB '06) you were left with a fair-to-middlin' catcher but his true value lay in the fact that he made the Cubs a fraction more interesting which is no small feat when the team is done by July year in and year out.

I think that was the reason he remained a personal favorite of mine. I devoted an inordinate amount of time dissecting the Cubs backstop, even snatching up his Baseball Reference page when it became available. Now I've got 7 more months of having my name attached to a guy who will wear a "sand" colored uniform half the time.

I'm still okay with that. Rob Bowen's bringing his .268 average to the Friendly Confines, but that doesn't really matter. The best thing he could do is punch the first person, teammate or foe, who gets in his face. That's called setting the tone.

The Cubs are also getting minor leaguer Kyler Burke but I don't know anything about him other than his parents took a perfectly good first name and just swapped out a T for a K which seems like a bad omen for a man who plies his trade at the plate. (Actually, it sounds like something Roger Clemens would do.)

I'm not fooling myself, this was purely a dump on the Cubs part. If either of those guys is still with the squad next spring I think you can consider that equal value.

And if not, well, we'll always have memories of Pierzynski.

Sammy 600* Sosa OR: What a day for the Cubs.

Looking for my opinion on Sosa's 600th? It's over on Bugs & Cranks.

Looking for my thoughts on the Michael Barrett trade and what it means for my Baseball-Reference sponsorship? That'll be up sometime Thursday morning.

For now, congratulations Sammy.

Image: Ben Sakoguchi

Morning Walk-thru - HiPlains General Store Open for Business

I think this is an official sports blog now...because I've got t-shirts on sale courtesy of Spreadshirt.com. All the big blogs do it so why not my small one?

This has less to do with my desire to make money and more to do with the fact that I've always wanted the chance to make my own t-shirts so, if you're so inclined, check it out in the sidebar or right here.

It's pretty rudimentary right now. Two designs--Cubs and Cornhuskers of course--using stock graphics and text, but I'm a writer not a graphic designer. I'm working on this whole vector graphics notion (using freeware no less) and once I get that figured out the sky's the limit. Besides, what better way to celebrate the grand opening than with your own white flag t-shirt? (And hitless innings from the bullpen to boot!)

If you have any suggestions or requests drop me an email at the company address.

If you're not watching the CWS, now would be a good time to start...I feel like the College World Series--probably the singular national event in the Cornhusker State--is getting the short end of the stick. It has its diehards, but the first coverage I'd seen on the major sports blogs was Deadspin's post yesterday and let's face it, they have their finger on the national sports pulse much more than the traditional outlets so if they're not picking up what Omaha is laying down who is?

Regardless, the battle at Rosenblatt has been about as intense as you can ask for of late. The little Cal schools played a 13-inning epic Monday and "the Eaters"--as the kids call them--did it again last night, vanquishing a throwback clad Arizona State squad in extras. (A big consolation prize to the Devils for wearing Bonds-era throwbacks. They were real double-knit pullovers, made by Wilson--Wilson!--complemented by real stirrups and sun gold hats.)

UCI has been my rooting interest throughout, but if I'm going to continue pulling for the Anteaters somebody needs to answer one question for me: who is the fat mustachioed gentleman int he Irvine dugout? I was watching last night's game with the volume down while listening to the Cubs so I missed any press box explanation.

In further self-promotion...HiPlainsDrifter.com is officially part of the Ballhype family. For those of you unfamiliar with the latest craze in sports blogging, Ballhype is a site that compiles a number of sports blogs and gives you the chance to hype your favorite articles and it's a great way to narrow down the content you're looking for. (For example: I've got college football and MLB as my two favorite categories in addition to being part of the Bugs & Cranks group, meaning all pertinent continent is brought to my attention.)

I should have full hypability integrated into this site before the week is out.

Don't make Carlos take off his belt

The Fightin' Cubs were at it again over the weekend. Cubs-Padres, Derrek Lee-Chris Young, two mighty swings-two strikes. Pretty conventional fare as far as baseball brawls go.

Until Carlos Zambrano got involved. While the rabble around home plate was busying itself with looking like a fight without actually fighting, third base coach Mike Quade was seen walking Carlos away from the scrum. Still not that interesting until you saw that Zambrano had his belt unbuckled and half-way off. (The full video is here, Zambrano's appearance is about 55 seconds in.)

Seeing that confirmed for me why Zambrano is still my favorite player in the game. What was he going to do once he got the belt off? Wield it like a medieval flail? Strangle somebody? Bend Khalil Green over his knee?

Thanks to Quade we'll never know and Carlos won't be sitting out any starts, but it's the thought that counts. When faced with the Cubs second dust-up in the past two weeks, Zamrano's response was: I need a weapon. Nobody else on the field, including Derrek Lee who threw the first punch, seemed that interested in actually brawling. Most came out of the dugout because they had to then quickly found somebody else to "hold back."

Not Carlos, he was ready to inflict damage. He treated it like a prison brawl in the yard at San Quentin, and I'm perfectly okay with that. While the Cubs are so often punchless, it's nice to know that at least one player on the squad definitely is not.

Of course the Cubs lost that game 1-0, and Sunday's game as well but I'm not throwing in the towel yet. Fighting is how Sweet Lou's squad motivates itself. After their last bench-clearer, the Cubs won 6 of their next 7 games.

Let's hope that's the case again. Chicago has its first off day in the month of June today. They went 9-8 over that stretch which, while certainly an improvement over their early season form, still won't be enough int he second half of the season. They'll have to start turning these 2 game winning streaks and 5-4 homestands into sweeps if they're going to narrow the gap in the Central.

Good news is, they've got the Rangers up next. That's a series you have to win.

Odds Sosa will hit number 600 against his former club? I'm laying 3-1.

Morning Walk-thru - Huh?

Cubs win again?...What's that you say? The Cubs won another one-run ballgame? This latest one a come from behind job with the go ahead RBI delivered by Cesar freakin' Izturis? You tell me that their last three wins have been by one run?!

Preposterous. But true.

Prior to this home stand, the Cubs genuinely were about 10 runs short of having a winning record and being neck and neck with the Brewers at the top of the Central. They'd outscored their opponents on the season, but when the games were tight so were the Cubs.

Maybe that's changing now. It's only four games, 2/81st of a major league season so I'm not going crazy yet, but the Cubs are 9-5 since Zambrano slugged Barrett.

And speaking of the Cubs backstop, looks like he'll be getting some time off in the next couple of weeks. Lou's saying all the right things, but privately I still think he's seething.

Blindsided...Who would've thought that Josh Becket's first loss of the season would've come against the Colorado Rockies? Not me, but maybe we should stop being surprised, the Rockies are .500 now thanks largely to going 15-6 in interleague play thus far.

Garrett Atkins is finally starting to hit, Matt Holiday has been one of the best players in the NL so far, Todd Helton has been Todd Helton, and Brad "This is Why I'm" Hawpe truly has been fly, flirting with the .300 mark.

The Red Sox on the other hand, just got rocked by the Rockies in their home park and we can keep being surprised by that because the Sox haven't been the Sox of late. (Exhibit A: Winning the Wakefield game but getting shelled with Schilling and Beckett on the bump.)

Meanwhile, the Yankees won their ninth straight. Two games over .500 and only 7.5 out. Something wicked this way comes Boston.

Oh and by the way...the Spurs are your NBA Champions. The last four minutes of last night's game were the first I made an effort to watch and I immediately regretted it. This series was sort of like watching a dung beetle do it's thing on the old Discovery channel. (When the channel was a punch line, not one of the best sources of programming on cable.)

You knew those beetles would get their shit together, literally, just like everyone knew the Spurs would get rid of the Cavs rather quickly. There wasn't any drama but there's still a bit of interest in the process. For me, that interest lasted about four minutes of the fourth quarter in game four. Then the Spurs won and the lamest championship celebration ever ensued.

Everyone just raised their hands and hugged one another. It wasn't joy, just relief. The Spurs were able to take what had been handed to them and now they can listen to dynasty talk until next October.

A Note from Your Sponsor

Beside the dish, at least at Wrigley, he's fine. Behind the dish, Michael Barrett continues to struggle.

The Cubs catcher picked up his 400th career RBI in the 8th, driving in Derrek Lee to tie the game, but I think the only thing Sweet Lou is thinking about this morning is another defensive lapse.

The short version: Barrett had a chance to make a play to keep the game tied in the top of the 13th and didn't.

The barely longer version: Jacque Jones actually made a decent throw to the plate, Barrett had it blocked, but when he went to tag Jose Vidro the ball simply wasn't there.

These things happen. I'm not blaming Barrett but I still have a feeling he's a continual resident in Pinella's doghouse. The Cubs are 1-6 in extra inning games, 4-14 in one-run affairs and it always seems like Barrett is somehow involved.

Of course, if you load the bases twice in the final five innings, once with no outs, and don't score a single run then you probably don't deserve to win anyway so keep your head up Michael.

It's Decoration Day...

...and I've a mind to roll a stone on the Cubs' grave.

Or, more likely, Sweet Lou will. I'm slowly building a case against Pinella. The charge? Attempted manslaughter. The victim? Michael Barrett.

Of all the things to be exasperated by in this short 07 season, the Cubs backstop, judging by the number of thousand yard stares he's earned from the skipper with his shaky defense and non-existent bat on the road, is the biggest sour taste for Sweet Lou right now.

But that's all for now, I'm simply building a case. It is a holiday so spirits should remain high. To aid in that endeavor, here's a clip of one of the greatest songs written in the past 15 years...

Happy Memorial Day.

Once we hit the #$%&! groove...it'll flow.

Did the Cubs hit that groove last night, finally beating San Diego? I'm not quite ready to say that considering it took three 9th inning groundballs to get what would be the two game winning runs home, but I'll take it. Can't say I've ever been concerned with winning pretty when it comes to the Cubs.

So to celebrate, I thought we'd revel in the lack of frustration today by remembering the not so good times. Now there are a lot of those to choose from, but through the magic of YouTube we're headed straight for April 29, 1983 and Lee Elia's infamous tirade.

To set the stage, Elia's Cubs had just fallen to 5-14 to start the '83 season and were booed at home by the 8,000 or so fans in attendance. What follows, is Elia's response:

(WARNING: This video/slide show contains explicit content that may be offensive to people without a sense of humor. No really, it's filthy. Luke Campbell and 2 Live Crew probably crammed as much profanity into three minutes as Elia did. Unless you're a sailor with some sort of Internet access, this is definitely NSFW.)






I would estimate that I feel that level of frustration with the Cubs at least five times a month. In fact, giving the Cubs odd disparity between meaningful statistics and actual wins this year, I'm officially proclaiming "Once we hit that #@$!&% groove, it'll flow" the official motto of the 2007 Cubs.

Morning Walk-thru - Karma...a foul temptress

Rumors of the Yankees death have been greatly exaggerated...The Bronx Bombers took two out of three from the Red Sox, trimming their lead to 9 1/2 games with only 117 left to play. I think it's a bit ridiculous to start counting games now. The debates started on Sunday: have the Sox buried the Yankees? Can a Rocket launch even help the Yankees overcome the light-years lead?

Three short years ago, such blatant tempting of fate would've been unthinkable here in New England. In fact, it still feels like an unnecessary luxury or even like a nervous giggle right before you get the crap kicked out of you, talking about a Sox lead in May. Bad Karma!

But after the ping pong balls set the Celtics back 7 or 8 years on Tuesday night, I say tempt away. There's now way one city can be asked to stomach the death of its storied basketball franchise and collapse against their arch-nemesis in one year right? These things have to even out.

Or do they?...Sean Marshall threw 104 pretty good pitches last night, but the only one that mattered was the one that got away. The Triple A call-up was cruising through 6 innings last night, holding the Padres to two hits and nursing a one-run lead, before giving up a single followed by a 2-0 home run to Kevin freakin' Kouzmanoff and that was it: 7 IP, 4 H, 2 ER, 1 BB, 8 SO and another one-run loss.

It was the Cubs 10th such loss this year, a season that's quickly shaping up to be one of the worst in recent memory. Not one of the worst teams, the team is actually good--we think--but one of the worst seasons because of the disparity between talent and results.

Almost exactly a month ago, I mentioned this exact plight on this very site. This week, Jonah Keri touched on it for ESPN.com. If you take a look at the Baseball Prospectus Adjusted Standings--which factor in a lot of important metrics, formulas and corollaries, both real and imagined--the Cubs are actually ahead of the the Brewers in the NL Central.

None of this makes me feel any better as it still leads to a painful, depressing conclusion: the Cubs are losing because they're the Cubs and I'm not quite sure how to handle that. I've had years of practice at overvaluing the squad, thinking they had a shot when they really didn't. That's easy. Been doing it for years. I was even excited when Henry Rodriguez joined the squad back in the day. I was delusional.

But this might be much worse. On paper, the Cubs are a National League favorite. But on that same paper, in a different section, they're still a sub-.500 team trying to stay alive in baseball's weakest division.

Whoever the cosmic accountant is has notoriously shoddy bookkeeping.

A Weekend of Endings?

Originally published in BostonNow.

There are two sides to The Sopranos. Some episodes are your good old fashioned, off a guy and scatter the appendages throughout New Jersey mob drama. Other episodes are more cerebral. Lots of therapist face time and ho-hum household tension.

It seems like the final season has been a little heavier on the cerebral side which is surprising when you consider there are only two episodes left. It's been like watching a firecracker fuse burn: you know the big boom is coming and the anticipation might just be better than the actual release.

We're about to find out if we've got an M80 or an inch-and-a-halfer, which got me thinking: what's the body count going to look like over these last two episodes? I'm not so sure it will be the shootout everyone thinks it is, but let's break it down:

-- Tony - Popular opinion seems to say that Tony's death is the only logical end and I tend to agree but I'd actually be more interested if the series ended with the Skipper still heavily mouth-breathing. Nevertheless, my money in the Black Hand Stakes is on Carm. After turning a blind eye to Tony's lifestyle the entire series, the revelation that Tony killed Christopher and Adriana will be too much to deal with. The perfect crime and catharsis.

--Phil Leotardo - Did you see the look Tony gave him at the end of the episode last night while Phil was yelling out his window like a little girl? He's gone.

--Paulie - He's just too big of a prick not to meet an ugly and (un?)timely fate. It's actually a miracle he's made it this long. Probably gone before the final episode.

--Silvio - The rock. I think Silvio escapes a dirt nap, but the preview for the penultimate episode led me to believe that he might turn on Tony. If that happens, goodbye Sil.

-- A.J. - The wildcard. The fate of Tony's heir might be the most interesting arc left. His time to die was last night and he escaped so I think he's safe unless things get totally Shakespearean.

Throw in a couple of random goons and I'm setting the body count over/under for the final two episodes of The Sopranos at 8.5.

This is Why I'm Hot

This is a rant. Call it catharsis. If you're not interested you can check out now, but I need this.

Is there anyone in the entire Cubs farm system that can get four batters out? The entire city of Chicago for that matter? It might be time for Sweet Lou to hold open try outs Invincible-style, find a beer distributor or a U. of Chicago physicist who just happens to throw 96 mph or an honest to God gyroball because what the Cubs have now isn't working.

I've dealt with my my share of Cub losses in my lifetime. 1840 of them to be exact and a few of them have felt worse than yesterdays 6-5 decision to the Mets, but I'm not sure any have looked worse.

With a four-run lead going in to the 9th inning it looked as though the Cubs were going to split with the NL East leading Mets. Then Ninja Dempster gave up two hits and two walks to force in a run and made way for Scott Eyre, who had no Eyrevision left thanks to wasting it two days earlier, and immediately gave up two singles. Game over.

After celebrating at the plate, Ruben Gotay tugged his crotch and spit a large glob of tobacco juice on my heart, which was lying halfway between the mound and home and I didn't even mind. Felt like I deserved it.

This was the eleventh loss for the bullpen this year. 11 in 39 games. What difference do 11 games make? In 2006 only one division race was decided by more than that margin (NL East), and none in 2005. With the Cubs, despite all of this, looking like maybe the only serious challenger to the Brewers in the NL Central it's impossible to believe that this won't catch-up to them in September. The bullpen is going to have to the best in the league for at least a month at some point this season just to get back to even.

Something has to happen now. Get me Sean Marshall or Carlos Marmol. Get them here tomorrow. I don't care who's out of options or who has to go down. Hell, give Larry Rothschild a butterfly net and have him hold it out over home plate. First five pitchers to hit it stay, the last one goes. (We may need to postpone Friday's crosstown battle to get this done, but whatever it takes.)

After the game Lou said, "I'll tell you what, these guys have to do it" and he's right. But I'm not sure the bullpen realizes that based on the post game comments out of Eyre and Dempster.

So let's shake things up. You can already see that Lou is absolutely terrified to go to the pen and who wouldn't be? No lead is safe. The impossible is possible and not in a good way. I've had enough adventure for an entire season.

The lone bright spot? The Brewers only won one against the Phillies.